Communication is key, but it’s tough to do when you don’t even know what you need or want. Even if you think you know what you need now, it may change in a few weeks. Here are a few techniques to explore the next time you want to be heard:
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Journaling. This doesn’t need to be complicated – it could be as simple as just making a note of when someone says or does something hurtful or helpful.
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Speak up. No one can read minds (as much as we would like them to at times!). With love and kindness, tell the people around you what your boundaries are. Tell them what is ok to say, what is ok to do, and what is not ok.
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Self-care. Listen, honor, and respect yourself.
Now, for implementing your voice. When you’re asked, “do you have kids?” or “when are you going to have kids?” How do you respond? Well…
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Who’s asking you?
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What do you want them to know?
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Consider the following groups: Family/close friends, friends/co-workers, strangers.
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What is your response to each of those groups?
Rehearse your responses and have a discussion with your partner so you’re on the same page.