Six Steps to Move the Infertility Needle

How toInfertility Resources
February 23, 2021


What does being out of balance feel like to you? Generally, when we feel out of balance it’s usually too much or too little energy. Too much energy typically comes in the form of anxiety, and too little energy (with or without depression) can make it difficult or impossible to take a step forward. If we stay in one of these states long enough we might find ourselves in a place of normalcy, or even worse, feeling both of these feelings at the same time. So what do you do?

First: Get out of your head

Analysis paralysis — have you heard of it? It doesn’t matter where you feel out of balance, if you think about your situation too much you can increase your anxiety or your inability to make a change. If you’re in this place or have ever been in this place, you’ll know that you can talk yourself into and out of every attempt at making a decision (or taking a step forward) 5 times in 10 seconds. You go in circles coming up with every scenario followed by a series of ‘what ifs.’ To get out of your head, notice your senses. Maybe have a cup of coffee or tea and notice the temperature, the scent, the taste, and the texture. Put on your favorite tunes, or watch your favorite show. Tapping into your senses pulls you out of your head and into your body.

Second: Breathe 

There is a plethora of evidence that shows the physiological benefits of deep breathing. We have written about it extensively here at Orchid Experience, and every phase of our Paths and Experience programs have a built-in breathing practice. If you need to calm down, deep diaphragmatic breathing will put you into a parasympathetic state. Exploring Sama Vritti, or circular breathing, by manipulating your inhalations and exhalations to be equal length will induce the relaxation response. Kapalabhati (forced exhales and passive inhales) breathing can help excite you and bring your energy back up by increasing your heart rate without even getting out of your chair. And the best part, both of these breathing practices can get you out of your head and into your body.

Third: Move

Movement can be a challenge when you’re feeling lethargic or depressed, but there are many gentle ways to start moving and increase your energy level. If you’re feeling low, try a restore to flow class where you start low and slow and gently add in more and faster movements. Overly anxious? Try a flow to restore, bleed off that excessive energy and slowly settle yourself back down. Yoga not your thing? Go for a walk in nature or take a walk around your local park.

Fourth: Sit with it

No, no. Don’t think about it, just sit with your feelings and sensations. Allow yourself to become aware of the physiological experience you’re having and notice where it is felt. When you sit do you feel like you need to move? Does it feel like energy is running through your body? Or do you feel heavy? Does it feel like where the earth ends and you begin are indistinguishable? Do you feel butterflies in your tummy? Or rocks in your thighs? All of these are different ways we can experience our emotions and thoughts. Just sit and notice, and if it feels right journal about it, but DON’T THINK ABOUT. Just write it down and walk away. Maybe tomorrow you can read what you wrote, but still don’t think about it.

Fifth: Make a decision

After you’ve gotten out of your head, breathed, moved, and sat with it, it’s time to make a decision. What does your gut say? What does your rational mind (after moving and breathing) say? What does your heart say? Make your decision and step away.

Sixth: Let go

This is the hard part — Let go. The only thing you can control is your reaction to a situation, and sometimes that is after a short impulsive reaction that you may not have any control over. Once you have made a decision, let it go. Trust that you are exactly where you need to be. You can’t control others, you can’t control the weather, and you can’t control what will happen next.

If you need to stop, breathe, and then move mindfully again, do it. Repeat this process as often as you need to move the infertility needle.