Self-awareness is a powerful tool, especially when facing life’s curveballs like infertility. The practice of understanding self offers us many benefits, which includes an understanding of:
Our belief system and how it informs our values and our decision-making process (e.g., not seeking guidance from an infertility specialist due to religious beliefs)
Our repetitive patterns that inhibit positive, healthy personal growth (e.g., constantly searching our symptoms online to see if we’re pregnant)
Our ability to accept and forgive ourselves and others (e.g., blaming our spouse or partner for our infertility)
How our thoughts and feelings reflect the information we’re receiving and how we’re interacting with our internal and external landscapes (e.g., overreacting to a situation that is unpleasant)
Our relationship with those we’re in partnership with, or at odds with (e.g., improve communication with partner)
Our ability to offer compassion, kindness, and grace to those around us and ourselves (e.g., finding a way to be ok with our younger sister getting pregnant before us)
Our ability to connect with ourselves on the deepest of levels (e.g., cultivating a strong foundation or sense of self that is unwavering during distress)
When we cultivate an inner knowing that originates from our center and examine what is there, we’re better able to use those insights to choose how we move forward in all facets of our lives, not just our trying to conceive journey.
Self-awareness is a learned skill. Below are the three steps we recommend for connecting to your center:
Creating space in your calendar for yourself on a regular basis is beneficial on many levels. You’re dedicating time just to you, no one else. In doing so, you’re establishing a connection with yourself that illuminates your deepest desires and needs. When you gain this understanding, you’re better able to determine how you move forward in the best ways possible for you.
Many of us are afraid to be alone with ourselves. But it’s necessary if we want to get to know ourselves better. Consider taking yourself for a walk without listening to music or journaling while you sip your morning tea or coffee. Other opportunities for secluding yourself are going for a drive to your favorite destination, watching a sunrise or sunset, or taking a weekend trip by yourself.
Now’s the time to settle into stillness. Just be. And this is hard for many of us. Maybe your mind is still over-active or you didn’t get a chance to move your body today (or both). If this is the case for you, go for a walk before you sit. Consider journaling or talking to a friend or therapist to get what’s in your heart and mind out there so that you can sit quietly.
Hopefully we’ve given you enough reasons and ways to cultivate self-awareness so that you may feel more in control of your life and path to parenthood.